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Hiding from Your Finances? How to Face Your Fears and Turn Things Around

Is there anything in your life that fills you with dread, or a sinking feeling of anxiety in the pit of your stomach? First dates? Going to the doctor? Surprise visits from your in-laws? How about something that comes around every month, like maybe your bills and financial statements? Just just looking at those words in black and white might be reminding you of the unopened stack (or emails) that you’ve been avoiding, and might be giving you that familiar sick feeling. So why do you do it? Why do you avoid dealing with your finances like the plague, when it’s clear that getting on top of them is a better plan of action? And what can you do to get over your anxiety and take charge of your financial life?

The Ostrich Effect

Psychologists actually have a name for that tendency to avoid information that you perceive as potentially unpleasant: the ostrich effect. The name comes from the common myth that ostriches bury their heads in the sand when they feel like they’re in danger. And while those birds don’t actually do that, we humans do have a tendency to ignore negative information at times of risk or danger, trusting that everything will go well without us taking any action.

This whole “head in the sand” thing might be exactly what you’re feeling like when it comes to your bills and financial statements – and you’re not alone. Many studies on the ostrich effect focus on how people handle financial information, including a famous one that found that investors tend to check on their portfolios more frequently when markets are performing well, but will “bury their heads in the sand” when markets are performing poorly. This is the case despite the fact that checking their portfolio could help these investors make more informed decisions.

Right – the fear we have of facing our finances is not rational, even though it’s very real. So real, in fact, that the American Psychological Association’s (APA) March 2022 Stress in America survey found that money stress registered at the highest level recorded since 2015. And while most people know that checking their bank account and dealing with their bills is necessary, doing so can cause stress and anxiety, because those figures are more than just numbers on a screen. They can represent how you feel about yourself, or bring up feelings of past childhood traumas or insecurities.

Sounds deep, right? Yup: psychologists have a lot to say on this subject, musing that financial avoidance is more than just “forgetting” to check your statements, or putting it off until a more convenient time. Here’s what a few have to say on the matter:

“Because money touches so many aspects of our lives, we project a tremendous amount of personal meaning onto it,” says Amanda Clayman, LCSW, a financial therapist who has formed a cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT)–based program focused on financial wellness. “It can represent your fear of failure, one-upsmanship with a sibling, regret over a bad spending habit, or frustration with where you are in life.”
According to Perpetua Neo, a psychologist who specializes in anxiety and frequently treats patients with financial anxiety, there’s typically a “story” attached to the stress surrounding our finances. It might be that you observed your parents getting distraught over bills or finances when you were a child, essentially normalizing that stress and making it something to avoid. Or maybe you experienced upheaval, like moving to a new place or switching schools, due to a parent’s job loss, meaning you associate finances with stress.

But she also points out that any trauma in our histories could trigger this kind of anxiety and tendency toward pessimism, as well as a desire to avoid those feelings: “When something bad has happened to us, our world of assumptions shatters and we start believing in the worst,” Neo says. “Our brains are wired to remember and be affected by loss.”

Other experts point out that sometimes financial anxiety stems from big life changes, like switching jobs, moving to a new city, or having a child. You might know you need to adjust how you manage your money, but the thought of actually doing it can be overwhelming.
You could also be overwhelming yourself, according to some therapists. You could be creating a vicious cycle of financial anxiety: you get behind, so you force yourself to do a super intense session of financial data review, bill paying, etc. You end up down a rabbit hole, and after hours and hours of looking at transactions and confusing data, you quit, exhausted, telling yourself that you were right to avoid the whole sordid affair all along.

Those are some of the possible why’s, but we also need to know what signs to look out for, and how you can make things better for your mental health and your bank account.

Signs You’re Hiding from Your Finances

So how do you know if you’re avoiding reality, and putting your head in the sand when it comes to your finances? Watch out for these signs:

You try to put money and finances out of your mind
You avoid talking about money with family and friends
You hide things about your finances from your partner
You avoid opening bank statements or credit card bills
You don’t know what your credit score is
You don’t know your net worth
You feel ashamed that you’ve let your bank statements, credit card bills, etc pile up
You feel caught in a cycle of self-blame

If any or all of the above sounds familiar, it’s time to get unstuck and move past the shame and self-blame, so you can take some concrete steps toward financial health. After all, if you continue to avoid dealing with your finances, you’ll most likely end up making more financial problems for yourself, and more anxiety, in the long run. The financial consequences of sticking your head in the sand could include:

Making bad decisions – If you don’t know where you stand financially, you could be tempted to spend more than you should on unnecessary expenses, which could also lead to difficulty making payments for the things you do need. All of these less-than-ideal decisions could land you in debt.

Allowing things to snowball – Continuing to spend while ignoring important information about your finances could cause any small financial problems to snowball into big debts.

Failing to meet financial objectives – You can’t save, or even pay off debts, if you don’t even know the basics of your financial situation!

Not only that, but the APA also points out that, if you do end up in debt because of your problems dealing with your finances, you could be setting yourself up for more than just a hit to your wallet. “Debt is associated with lower self-esteem, lower productivity, and greater stress,” according to the APA. “Unsurprisingly, research has also linked financial strain to depression.”

But don’t despair! You’ve done enough catastrophizing…now it’s time to get on top of things!

How to Take Back Control

You can do this! You might feel like things are spiraling out of control, and you’ll never be able to take your hands away from your eyes and look at the real state of affairs, but there are steps you can take to get on top of things. And step one? Recognizing what that you’re hiding from your finances – you’ve come this far, so you’re on your way!

The strategies you can employ to reduce the ostrich effect when it comes to your finances include:

Start slowly

According to Clayman, “Any change—even good change—creates a certain amount of associated stress.” So if you’re finally looking at your finances for the first time in a while, the first thing you should do is simply gather information, not jump in and start trying to make changes immediately. You could end up overwhelmed again! So, for example, if you’re concerned about your budget, spend a month observing your spending patterns. Look at when you spend money, and what you’re buying. Figure out what your spending patterns are, and why you might be spending in that way. Once you’ve done this, you can hopefully start to find healthier ways to meet your emotional needs, other than overspending.

Once you’ve gotten past that first look (and realize you can do it), experts recommend that you figure out how much time per week you’re willing and able to spend dealing with your finances, and then be consistent about it. If 30 minutes per week sounds doable, start there, and ensure it becomes part of your routine. If that sounds overwhelming, start smaller: dedicate 15 minutes a week to banking, or perform one manageable-feeling task each day, like paying or even simply reading one bill. The more you accustom yourself to doing these little things – and sticking with them consistently – the more you’ll realize that it’s not so scary after all. Remember, you’ve got this!

Distance yourself

If you’re really having trouble taking that first peak, you can try what psychologists call “debiasing techniques.” This can include creating psychological distance from the problematic information, so you’re less likely to avoid it. For example, this could involve pretending that you’re looking up information so you can help a friend, rather than addressing your own issue.

Use technology

bell notification in a blue circle — *Set up scheduled emails or notifications that provide you with all your necessary information once a month.*

Try setting up scheduled emails or notifications that provide you with all your necessary information once a month, in a format that you’re likely to check. And don’t stop at getting your info automated: arrange to have a portion of your paycheck automatically deposited into your savings account and your retirement account, and set up automatic reminders to alert you when a bill is due. It’s a lot harder to make a bad decision when the decision is out of your hands! You can also use budgeting apps or other software to help you keep track of your finances in a simple, unintimidating way.

Have an accountability partner

Just as you can use technology as an “external mechanism” as psychologists say, you can also use someone who cares about you as an external mechanism. They can help to hold you accountable and make sure you’re dealing with the information that you need to deal with.

Make a plan B (and C)!

All the experts tell you to make a plan and a budget, and then stick to it. But Clayman recommends having not just a plan A, but also a plan B and C, so you don’t get too freaked out when making changes in your financial life. According to her, “When we feel trapped, and forced into a change, our brain goes into fight or flight mode, and it becomes much harder to manage our rebellious impulses.” If you give yourself multiple options, you’ll be more likely to feel in control, and less likely to stick your head in the sand.

Reward Yourself

You can also make dealing with your finances less stressful and scary by making doing so a more pleasant affair. Some experts suggest things like “money dates,” in which couples get together, work on their finances, and then spend some time together over dinner or with a bottle of wine. Or perhaps you can schedule getting your finances in order right before something more enjoyable, like a TV show you want to binge, or a night out with friends. “Rewards are an excellent way to reinforce progress and help [yourself] stay consistent,” Clayman says. “They don’t have to be extravagant or exotic. The most important aspect of the reward is that you truly enjoy it, and associate it with your effort.”

Hey, we get it: adulting is hard, and one of the hardest parts is dealing with your finances. But sticking your head in the sand and ignoring your statements and bills is not the way to stay on top of things! But neither is beating yourself up with blame and shame, so do yourself a favor: think about why you might be doing what you’re doing, and then slowly start to find a practice and a routine that allows you to take control of your financial life, and get yourself on the road to feeling some relief from your anxiety.

Are We Still Paying the Pink Tax?

We’re all about equality in this country, right? We even have a whole holiday to celebrate the noble idea that “all men are created equal,” as laid out in the Declaration of Independence. But there are still so many little things (and yes, big things, too) that can make us feel like it’s just the men that are created equal around here. And while it might not be the most important thing, the fact that women have been paying more for products for a very long time – a phenomenon known as “the pink tax” – is one of those things.

Sure, a few extra bucks here and there might seem like a small thing, but these little upcharges can add up. Not only that, but the fact that women are treated this way can be frustrating at best, and part of the reason women can feel like the perpetual and unequal “other” at worst. So what is this pink tax? What are women paying more for? And is there any way to avoid the pink tax?

What Is the Pink Tax?

pink razor silhouette — *Women’s hygiene products are still being taxed more than men’s.*

You know what most women would like freedom from? Their periods. But adding insult to injury is the fact that, unless they are using a form of birth control that causes them to have fewer or no periods, they have to buy some sort of product or products to keep things under control. And shockingly, period-related products are still taxed in 30 out of 50 states, despite calls to ban this practice at the federal level, and despite the fact that most other necessities are not taxed.

But if you’re thinking that period products are the only thing that women have to shell out extra money for, you’re sadly mistaken – and the tax on tampons is not even the actual pink tax, it’s just the tip of the iceberg. The pink tax actually refers to the price difference between any product marketed to women and comparable gender-neutral products or products for men.

These products might or might not be wrapped in pretty pink packaging, but that doesn’t make the pill any easier to swallow. So, not only do women make, on average, only 82 cents for every dollar men make (and that’s if those women are white, statistics are even more dire for women of color), many companies also expect them to pay more for products like:

Body washes
Razors
Lotions
Deodorants
Anything packaged in “feminine” packaging: for example, in 2012, Bic marketed a two-pack of pink and purple “Bic For Her” pens for $5.60, while selling a four-pack of the exact same pens in black and blue colors for $3.37.

And this is not just us grumbling while we stroll down the aisles of our local drugstore. This is a problem that has been recognized by The Joint Economic Committee of the United States Senate (JEC), who wrote an entire report on the implications of the Pink Tax in 2016. They found that there was absolutely a markup on personal care products: in fact, the markup in that category alone was 13%! And in addition to these markups, they also found that manufacturers also markup toys, clothing, and senior care items. Overall, 42% of women’s products cost more, while only 18% of men’s products are more expensive. And guess what? You’re not imagining things if you think that you’re being upcharged for certain services: pricing differences were also observed in service-based industries such as auto repair.

The pink tax can be obvious, like in the example of the Bic pens: sometimes companies simply markup items that are marketed towards women. In other cases, it’s a little bit sneakier: companies will offer a package of items marketed towards women for the same price as a more neutral package or a package marketed towards men, but the package will contain less of the product. So women will end up paying the same as men, but getting less.

So why are all of these markups a big deal? Not only is it insulting to women, but it also means that they can end up paying more than $1,300 more than men on products every year.

Why Do We Have a Pink Tax?

The tempting answer to why there’s a pink tax is: the patriarchy. And, ok, that might be true, but we’ll have to smash that another day. There are actually a few reasons why women are charged more for certain items, however unjustifiable they might seem. For example, women are charged more for products marketed to them because:

Tariffs on women’s clothing tend to be higher than those on men’s clothing: about 15.1% compared to 12.9%, respectively, and that difference is passed on to consumers.
The concept of price differentiation dictates that the product which is considered the “standard” is produced at a higher volume than more “specialty” products, like the pink alternatives for women. As a result, pink women’s razors, for example, cost more to make, and that cost is once again passed on to consumers.
Price fixing is a problem. Price fixing means that lack of competitiveness in the market allows large companies to dictate the price of goods and services, since they prevent companies that would potentially drive down the cost of products and services from entering the market.
Price discrimination is also an issue. Companies price products differently (less) for people who they want to entice to buy – they assume they’ve got a lock on women, so they charge them more because they think they will buy anyway. “I think that if the consumer is willing to pay more for a certain color, then it’s in manufacturers’ and marketers’ best interest to charge more,” said Christine Whelan, a professor of consumer science at the University of Wisconsin Madison and director of the university’s MORE (Money, Relationships, and Equality) program. “But I do mind that people don’t know about this.”

We mind, too, and we think you should know about it, so you can make the best decisions for you. But is there any way to avoid the pink tax?

Avoiding the Pink Tax

The pink tax is so ingrained in the way that companies sell, and the way that we buy, that it can be hard to completely avoid it. But there are some things you can do to reduce its impact, like:

Buy products that are gender-neutral, or marketed to men – This might be tougher if you’re married to a certain scent of deodorant or lotion; otherwise, don’t hesitate to sniff around. In addition, we urge you to try men’s razors: even the ones marketed as “one-time use” will tend to last longer as razors for leg skin than as razors for delicate facial skin. Just be careful: you’ll have to do the math to see how much you’re getting for the price when you choose between men’s/gender-neutral products and women’s products.

Buy clothes that don’t require dry cleaning – Some states have tried to outlaw service providers like hair salons and dry cleaners charging more for women customers, but in most cases, you’re going to pay more for these kinds of things.

Buy used clothing – You can help the environment and avoid those silly tariffs and upcharges for women’s more “complicated” clothing.

Look into companies that are anti-pink tax – Some companies, like Billie (which sells women’s razors), Boxed (an online retailer that sells items in bulk), and Brandless (which sells its own products to reduce markups) are committed to creating and selling products to women at a fair price, and they’re worth a look.

Buy gender-neutral items for girls when possible – Sometimes you just can’t get away from the unicorns, but you might be able to persuade the littles to go for a red scooter or helmet, for example, instead of a pink one, which could save you some money.

Try reusable period products – There are some great options on the market nowadays, like cups, reusable pads, and even period underwear. Think of all the money you could save on that monthly expense!

Finally, you need to speak up! Call out the companies who you see marking up items marketed towards women, and complain to the highest-up person you can reach. That means calling their corporate office, not just speaking to a customer service rep. And don’t stop there: shame them on social media, and tell your friends as well as your local consumer protection agency. According to Whelan, “The more people we can get to say, ‘No, I’m not going to pay extra for these products,’ then the companies won’t make them — or they won’t charge extra,” Whelan said. “This is about supply and demand.”

In addition, don’t forget to advocate with your local government officials for banning the tampon tax – nobody should have to pay more for such a necessary product!

We’ve got a lot to fight for, but don’t get tired, and don’t think that little things like the pink tax aren’t worth your time. It all adds up and it all makes a difference in women’s lives!

Feeling Some Feelings? Find the Best Workout for Your Mood!

Hey, how are ya feeling today? Really, we want to know! Are you a bit tired (we know that feeling), feeling down in the dumps, or filled with anxiety? Are you just totally jazzed to be alive (we hope so!) or ticked off at the world in general? Now that you’ve taken a moment to think about your mood, take a moment to think about how you’re feeling about getting your workout in. If that feeling can be summed up by a sound like “meh,” or “nah,” maybe you need to find the right workout for your mood!

It’s Not All About Endorphins

cutout of a head with a smiley face where the brain is — *Endorphins come into play differently based on your mood and certain workouts.*

We all know the physical benefits of exercise by now, and maybe even a lot of the mental health benefits, as well. It’s all about the endorphins, right? Well, yes and no. Endorphins, those natural painkillers that get released when your body is under stress, can give you that happy feeling sometimes known as “runner’s high,” but it turns out that they don’t kick in for everyone during every workout.

It turns out, according to recent studies, they come into play only during activities done at certain intensities or for certain durations, and what triggers them can actually vary from person to person. For example, a recent study showed that a brief HIIT session triggered more of an endorphin rush than an hour of moderately intense cycling did, with some participants getting a surge of endorphins at lower intensities than others did.

So why are we telling you this at the same time that we’re encouraging you to workout? Because these results aren’t necessarily a bad thing, they just go to show that it’s important to match your workout to your mood, maybe by choosing activities that prompt other positive responses, including the release of “happy hormones,” and/or an instant shot of energy.

After all, an endorphin rush is just one way movement can boost your mood and decrease those bummer feelings. Or, sometimes exercise can help you to work through the feels, especially if those feels involve anger, and are making you want to throw something – or someone – out the window. But save your strength! And check out the best types of workouts for whatever your mood might be.

The Right Workout for All the Feels You’re Feeling

We know exercise can lower stress hormone levels, reduce symptoms of anxiety and depression, improve confidence, distract you from negative thoughts, and boost your mood, to name a few of the mental health benefits. And the great thing is that studies show that exercise actually helps promote the growth of new neurons in key areas of the brain, including the hippocampus, so it could be possible to keep mental health issues at bay, just by getting your daily sweat on.

But first, you’ve got to lace up those sneakers and get it done, and that means working out in the way that’s right for the headspace you’re in that day, whether it means using your feelings to get more out of your workout, or using your workout to get the most out of your feelings.

Your mood: Down in the dumps

Feeling low, blue, blah, low energy? You’re probably not going to get much out of an intense burst of HIIT, even with the possibility of an endorphin rush – and you’re probably not going to be able to convince yourself to do it, anyway.

Your workout: Steady-state cardio

Try instead what’s known as steady-state cardio, like a jog, or even a walk if that’s all you can muster today. While you probably won’t get a rush of endorphins from a more moderate workout, even if it’s a bit longer than a HIIT session, you probably will trigger the release of some other feel-good chemicals, like dopamine (the chemical responsible for feeling great when you satisfy your urges like eating something delicious or having sex) and serotonin (the chemical that’s flowing through you when you laugh or feel the sun shining on you).

Try to choose something that will also bring you joy, whether that’s walking at sunset, hiking, jogging on the beach, getting together with a friend and doing a sport you enjoy, or even trying some dance cardio. Remember to keep at it for more than 10 minutes, and hopefully for at least 30 – you can do it!

Your mood: Full of frustration

Feeling ready to scream? Yeah, we know that one – everything in your day just seems to be going wrong, and while you’re not exactly angry, you’ve got that balled-up feeling inside that just feels ready to burst out the next time you drop something or something doesn’t work out the way you wanted it to. That feeling requires opening a release valve!

Your workout: HIIT

No steady-state cardio for you today, you need the full-on cocktail of endorphins, serotonin, and dopamine that comes with an all-out workout. So try something intense that challenges your body, like high intensity interval training, or HIIT. This type of workout usually involves doing short bursts of super intense activity, followed by even shorter rest periods (think: 50 seconds of burpees followed by 10 seconds rest, then 50 seconds of squat jumps followed by 50 seconds rest, etc).

The chemical reactions triggered by working out like this can help you cope by squashing frustrating feelings, and the focus required to finish a challenging workout can take your mind off your problems. Bonus: HIIT workouts tend to be shorter, so once you’ve released your frustrations, and boosted your mood, you can get back to your day and turn things around!

One word of warning from the experts: just be careful not to push too far past your usual effort level. One study found that going overboard can increase negative feelings, because you could end up putting too much stress on your body, leaving you feeling bummed out. To give you some idea of what might be too much, one study found that pushing your heart rate over 90% of its max for more than 40 minutes a week is linked to irritability and can increase your risk of injury.

And one more note: some experts also suggest using some other psychological tactics other than just distraction to get the most out of your workout on a day when you’re feeling frustrated. For example, try changing up the order you usually do things to give yourself a psychological boost. How? According to Ted Butryn, Ph.D., an assistant professor of sports psychology and sociology at San Jose State University, “Starting your routine with…exercises that you usually do after your muscles are exhausted makes it easier to use more weight during those exercises. This changeup can leave you feeling stronger than usual, giving you the psychological boost you may need to keep exercising that day.”

Your mood: Anxiety alert

Uh-oh. You’ve got that feeling in the pit of your stomach again. Anxiety has reared its ugly head, and your mind is racing, going to all of the worst case scenarios you can possibly imagine. Now’s not the time to try to learn an upbeat dance routine, you need to clear your mind.

Your workout: Uncomplicated cardio

When anxiety hits, it’s time for you to hit the treadmill, or the road for a jog or bike ride, or do any other type of uncomplicated cardio, but at perhaps a higher intensity level than you would if you were feeling blue. Doing aerobic activity like this helps to clear your mind: “Not having to be too creative about your exercise will leave you more time to think through whatever’s causing you that anxiety,” says Richard Marsella, Ph.D., author of Welcome to Stress Management.

We do want to point out that some experts recommend weightlifting for stress, because it requires you to be more mindful as you slow down and focus on your movements and on keeping good form. In fact, some research points to the possibility that strength training may lead to improved regulation of the system that handles your happy hormones, which could help you better handle stress over time. But there is other research that shows that you should be careful with weightlifting when you’re dealing with stress’ more jittery cousin, anxiety. According to psychologist Keith Johnsgard, “Research has shown that weight lifting can sometimes elevate anxiety levels for as long as one hour afterward, whereas aerobic exercise can lower anxiety levels way below their baseline.”

Your mood: Totally unproductive

Can’t seem to get yourself motivated? Just sitting there, staring at your computer screen, getting nothing done, and feeling like you’re phoning everything in? Don’t mindlessly choose a run on the treadmill, which could end up feeling like more wasted time, make yourself feel accomplished!

Your workout: Compound strength training

To give yourself that feeling of accomplishment, try a workout that includes compound exercises, or moves that target multiple muscle groups at once, and trick your mind into getting into gear. These types of moves include multi-functional, strength-training moves like rows with lunges, step-ups with bicep curls, burpees, single-arm renegade rows, squats with overhead presses, and so on. According to trainer Meghan Trainor, “Add as much spice and pizazz to reset your mind into feeling productive and accomplished. You can always modify for your fitness level, but make it challenging and surprise yourself with how well you do.”

In addition, if your productivity problem is related to feeling overwhelmed, you might want to also try something that involves breathwork, like yoga, Tai Chi, pilates, or simple stretching, which can help calm your nervous system. You can even do these types of exercises as a cool down, and do double duty for your mood!

Your mood: Aggressively angry

Ok, now you’re p***ed. You’re not just frustrated, you’re ready to bite anyone’s head off who gives you a second look. Time to not only work through those feelings, but also use them to get the most out of your workout.

Your workout: Weightlifting, HIIT, or Kickboxing

You’re going to want to get some of that aggression out, so yes, HIIT, or even a kickboxing-style workout, are great choices to let off some steam. But you might also want to consider starting out with a weightlifting routine. Anger actually makes you feel stronger; it elicits the greatest fight-or-flight response from your body, so you can use that hormonal surge for more strength. Use that adrenaline spike to try lifting a little heavier, or adding a few more reps – just remember to keep good form and listen to your body.

Your mood: Finding fault…with yourself

Feeling self-critical? You’re probably just going to end up beating yourself up if you can’t accomplish what you want to do (and you might not feel so jazzed about getting outside in a skimpy workout outfit for all to see). But there are actually exercises proven to help.

Your workout: Hatha yoga

Did you know that there are such things as “power poses,” or stances that give you an instant feeling of strength, energy, and confidence? While the mechanisms of how they work are still a bit unclear, researchers have found that postures like standing tall with your hands on your hips can have a physiological and behavioral effect that can increase your feelings of power. And you know what? Yoga poses that are similarly expansive, when held for just 2 minutes, can be beneficial too, increasing your self-esteem and energy, per other research.

So if you’re having a day when you’re being super hard on yourself, and can’t seem to do your usual workout, try Hatha yoga. This practice emphasizes holding static poses, giving you enough time to settle into your sense of strength and stability.

On a final note, if you’re having an absolutely smashing day, we are so happy for you! In that case, you’re probably already feeling great about working out, and maybe even have your favorite type of movement all lined up. Awesome! But don’t just go through the motions: when you’re feeling good, it’s time to raise the bar (no pun intended). Lift heavier or add more sets, do weightlifting exercises on one leg, run faster, farther, or both. The feel-good chemicals you release plus the feeling of accomplishment you get from upping the ante will be like compound interest on your good mood!

And really, what it all comes down to is doing what feels good to you on that particular day, in that particular moment and headspace. Science tells us these are probably the best movements for these moods, but you also have to do you! The most important thing is to get moving, because – trust us – you’ll feel better once you do.

Summertime Blues: Are You Suffering from Summer SAD?

Summer is in full swing, and everyone’s out there basking in the sun, enjoying themselves with their guns and buns out, etc, etc. Right? Well, maybe not everyone. Maybe you’re not so jazzed it’s summer, maybe you’re even feeling a little…sad, or dare we say, depressed? But why? You could actually be suffering from seasonal affective disorder (SAD) – and before you dismiss that as something people only experience in the winter months, you need to know that this mental health issue can affect different people at different times of the year. So what causes SAD in the summer, what does it look like, and what can you do to make your summers a little brighter?

What Is SAD?

What do we mean in general when we talk about seasonal affective disorder, or SAD? While this is often called the winter blues, or something similar, and many people write it off as just being bummed that the weather isn’t so great, SAD is actually a legitimate mental health concern. It can be characterized by prolonged or recurring bouts of depression, and is closely linked to the changing of seasons (any season!) and changes in natural light.

person sitting under a tree by a beach — *The transition from winter into spring and summer can trigger mental health issues.*

And yes, while it is often linked to winter, with its shorter days, lack of light, weather that can affect going out, and often fewer opportunities to socialize, it is actually simply “defined by a regular, temporal relationship between a particular time of the year and a major depressive episode,” according to Rachel Landman, licensed mental health counselor and chief operating officer at Humantold, an online therapy services platform. While for some, it might have a lot to do with a lack of natural light (hence the prevalence of wintertime SAD), for many, it’s more about change.

So, the transition from winter into spring and summer can trigger mental health issues, too. In fact, while around 5% of the population seems to suffer from SAD, 10% of those experience the “blues” in the spring and summer, with symptoms subsiding when fall comes back around – the opposite of what many people think of when they think of SAD. Let’s take a closer look at why this might be happening to some people.

Why Causes SAD in the Summer?

If you don’t suffer from summer SAD, and you’re a real lover of all things hot and summery, you might be scratching your head wondering why anyone would feel depressed when the seasons once again swing back to this time of year. And even if you do suffer from it, you might also be wondering if you’re crazy, and why you can’t just enjoy the season like everyone else seems to be able to do.

If you really think about it, though, change, especially in predictable routines that give our lives their shape, can be difficult to deal with. And summer brings with it a particular set of changes, as well as certain physical and mental discomforts that can be problematic for some people. For example, summer can bring with it:

Unpredictableness, and a lack of routine

Say what you will about other seasons, but compared to summer, they tend to lend themselves more to structure, and a less chaotic routine. And changes to routine, or feeling like your days lack structure, can set off a series of feelings that can lead to SAD. According to Landman, “A contributing factor to good mental health is having a predictable routine; the summer often disrupts that, causing symptoms to flare up.” For example, if you’re a mother, you might struggle with the anxiety of having to plan long days with your children at home. In addition, changes to routine like going on vacation can have a big impact on your mental health: while some people might think relaxation when they think of heading out on a trip, others might think anxiety and stress.

Weather that’s not everyone’s cup of tea

While some people might relish a scorching hot day on the beach, not everyone is thrilled to spend their days commuting or running around after kids in what can feel like oppressive heat. It can start to feel almost like the weather is torturing you personally, and you might even feel physical symptoms, like headaches, which can trigger emotional distress.

And while lack of light affects some people in a negative way, too much daylight can be a problem for others. The long days of summer can actually affect some people’s sleep, which can negatively impact mental health.

Not only that, but while we usually think of winter weather as the culprit behind ruined plans, summer weather can also cause distressing changes in routine and socializing. It might be too hot to do certain outdoor activities, and if you generally do those activities with friends, you might find yourself more and more isolated in air-conditioned spaces. According to Sherry Benton, PhD, ABPP, psychologist and founder and chief science officer of TAO Connect, an online therapy assistance resource, “In optimal times we have a balance of activities that maintain our well-being. This includes exercise, social activities, activities that provide purpose and meaning, spiritual activities, and so forth. When large shifts in weather or environmental factors interfere with these activities we’re at risk for seasonal depression. Anytime your usual sources of well-being and self-care are disrupted you may be at risk.”

Body image issues

blurred out picture of a woman sitting down looking at a scale — *Many people dealing with summertime blues deal with body image issues.*

Let’s face it: all the talk about getting beach-body-ready is not helping anyone’s mental health, especially after two years of unprecedented weight gain in the U.S. population. And all of the flesh on display in the summer heat can lead some people to make unhealthy comparisons, and worry about the way that their own bodies stack up, as they feel pressured to bare more of their skin.

Great expectations

Last but not least, we shouldn’t discount the toll that the great expectations of summer can take on someone who just isn’t feeling it. It might seem like everyone is out there, livin’ life, enjoying the outdoors – and if you’re more the, well, “indoorsy” type, that could be problematic for you. You might even end up feeling guilty, or like something is wrong with you, if you’re not “taking advantage” of every moment of summer. According to Landman, “People experiencing SAD struggle to find motivation to leave the house and engage in social interaction, which in return leads to further depressed mood—a never-ending, vicious, self-sustaining cycle.”

So, yes: there are, without a doubt, things that can trigger mental health issues, ranging from the blues to serious depression, in the summer. And if you find yourself nodding along and saying, yeah, that lack of routine, or that enforced feeling of fun, really get to me, you could be facing summer SAD. Let’s take a closer look at the symptoms of summer SAD to help you further recognize it in either yourself or a loved one.

Symptoms of Summer SAD

No matter what time of year SAD comes on, it is generally considered a type of depression, so seasonal depression can look very similar to major depressive disorder – the difference, as we pointed out above, is that it is linked to a certain time of year. If you’re suffering from SAD, you might experience the following symptoms as spring and summer hit:

Sadness
Apathy
Lethargy
Loss of motivation and interest in activities
Anxiety or worry
Hypersomnia (excessive sleepiness or drowsiness) or fatigue
Insomnia, with pacing, restlessness, and racing thoughts
Lack of appetite
Feelings of guilt
Having trouble making decisions or staying focused

Remember, if you’re struggling with these symptoms, consider speaking to a trusted professional, and if your depression escalates to thoughts of suice, immediately contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255, or call 911 if you are in crisis.

Coping with Summer SAD

Again, summer SAD is totally a thing! And it can be really rough, especially since it has the added “bonus” of being not so common, and a little confusing to people who don’t get it. But you feel the way you feel, and if you feel the warm weather blues creeping in, there are a few strategies to try. For example:

Identify your positive and negative triggers – It’s important to know what triggers you in a negative way during the summer, but you should also try to keep in mind the things that trigger your more positive state of mind in other seasons – the things that you feel are missing. That way you can really focus on what you can do to fill those needs in the warmer months.

Give yourself a break from the expectations – Yes, it’s summer, but it’s also ok to say “no” to things that aren’t for you. Just remember to find a balance between doing everything and completely withdrawing.

Make sleep a priority – Again, the long, light-filled days can actually affect your sleep, which in turn affects your mental health, so you’ll have to make more of an effort to get the solid shut-eye you need to boost your mood. Try relaxation or sleep aid apps, have a predictable bedtime and wake-up time, and try to keep your room cool and dark.

Create a routine – Speaking of routines, if the chaos of summer has got you down, try making a routine for yourself and sticking to it. Schedule everything from bedtime, mealtimes, and wake-up times to time for socializing, exercising, meditating, and other types of self-care.

Feel your feelings – It’s easy to shut down in both body and mind when you experience summer SAD, so try to find time to experience your emotions (even if it’s 10 minutes a day), which can help stop your body from shutting down so much.

Avoid “depression traps” – Using unhealthy behaviors to cope with your feelings could lead you to do things that aren’t in your best interest, like spending too much money, drinking or eating much, or spending too much time isolated playing video games or scrolling on the internet.

Stay cool – It’s ok to head indoors when the heat and humidity soar; heading somewhere cool can help to stave off the agitation, stress, and depression that excessive heat can bring. And don’t forget to stay hydrated! Having a headache will only add to your negative emotions.

Get a little help from your friends – If parenting in the summer is triggering your SAD, try banding together with other parents to share the extra responsibilities that come when school lets out. For example, exchange childcare days, or start a carpool for summer camps and activities.

Get a little help from a pro – Experts recommend that you seek professional help if your SAD symptoms affect your life for 2 weeks or more, but they also agree that you should get help anytime you feel like you could benefit from it.

It’s true that summer means carefree fun for a lot of people – but definitely not for everyone! If you suffer from summer SAD, you’re not alone, and you have no reason to feel guilty or like a misfit. You simply need to recognize what you’re experiencing, and find ways to bring brightness to the brightest of seasons, even if that means speaking to a mental health professional. We wish all of you out there a happy and safe summer, and would love to hear how these hot, sunny months affect you!

Numbers Can Lie: Is BMI Biased?

Going to the doctor for a checkup can mean being bombarded with numbers. Your cholesterol levels, blood pressure, heart rate – not to mention, some people’s least favorite number to get thrown at them: that little digital number staring back at them from the scale. But it doesn’t end there: your doctor will then use your weight to calculate what is known as your body mass index, or BMI, which is a measure of your body fat based on your height and your weight.

This number might say a lot to your doctor about your health status, and determine a lot about the care you receive. It can even be used when determining things like your life insurance rates! But is a simple calculation of your height and your weight really enough to say so much about your health? A lot of experts say no, especially since BMI has a problematic history, and can be racially and gender-biased. So how can a number be biased? Let’s take a look.

What Is BMI?

How is your BMI calculated and what does it supposedly mean? Your body mass index is a calculation that is meant to measure your body fat; to figure it out, you take your weight in kilograms and divide it by your height in meters squared. That number will determine whether you are considered underweight, normal weight, or obese. You are considered:

Normal weight if your BMI is between 18.5 and 25
Overweight if it is between 25 and 30
Obese if you have a BMI of 30 or more

This system might sound a little too simplistic and cookie-cutter to give an accurate picture of your body composition. And in fact, it was designed to be simple. BMI was devised in the 1830s by Lambert Adolphe Jacques Quetelet (1796-1874), a Belgian mathematician, sociologist, statistician, and astronomer, and during Quetelet’s time there were no calculators, computers or electronic devices, which is probably why he opted for a super-simple system.

But we’ve obviously moved on in terms of diagnostics in many ways since then, and we have a lot more technology at our fingertips, so is BMI still the best way to determine how healthy we are, and to assess our health risks? Many experts say no, especially since the one-size-fits-all (no pun intended) nature of BMI can be very problematic.

BMI’s Problematic History

Here’s the thing about the history of BMI, or rather, here are two things: first, Quetelet did not intend his “Quetelet Index” to be used for individuals; it was meant to be a population-level tool. Second, this tool was developed using data from predominantly European men – and almost no study today conducted on one ethnicity or gender would be considered accurate if applied to people outside of those groups.

But still, physiologist Ancel Keys reintroduced the calculation in 1972, because he was irritated that life insurance companies were estimating people’s body fat (and so, their risk of dying) by comparing their weights with the average weights of others of the same height, age, and gender. So he conducted a study of more than 7,000 healthy, mostly middle-aged men, and found that body mass index was a more accurate predictor of body fat than the method that was being used by life insurance companies. The Quetelet Index was thus rebranded as BMI, and it has since been adopted by the medical community as a way to measure individual health. And the rest is history: we are now told that a BMI outside the “normal” range (18.5-25) is considered less healthy, and an indicator of greater health risks.

books and pen — *Critics are now pointing out that this measure of body fat, and ultimately health, is not just unreliable, but also racist and sexist.*

Taking all of this history of BMI into account, critics are now pointing out that this measure of body fat, and ultimately health, is not just unreliable, but also racist and sexist. According to Sabrina Strings, an assistant professor at the University of California, Irvine, “It is racist, and also sexist, to use mostly white men within your study population and then try to extrapolate that and create norms and expectations for women and people of color. They have not been included in the initial clinical analyses, and therefore their actual health outcomes cannot be determined by these findings.”

Not only that, but the development of BMI as a health marker is also actually rooted in racist ideas that upheld certain northern and western European bodies as the ideal, bodies that tended to be thinner than those of eastern and southern Europeans, as well as Africans and people from other parts of the world. That means that it’s very easy for people who aren’t in that “ideal” category to be viewed as “inferior,” just because of one simple calculation.

In addition, BMI was created when there wasn’t much understanding of the relationship between health and weight – something we’re still trying to figure out. For example, some experts point to other cultures who tend to have higher BMIs, but better health outcomes than some Western populations. So with all of these problems with BMI, why do we still place so much importance on it, and how does that importance affect our everyday lives?

How BMI’s Bias Can Affect Care

Just how does the fact that BMI is unreliable, and even racist and sexist, affect people in the real world? Well, first of all, some experts think it’s really not an accurate measure of health: according to Jennifer Gaudiani, an internal medicine physician and certified eating disorder specialist based in Denver, Colorado, “We cannot use weight as a marker of health. It just does not correlate, except on the very extremes.” She thinks that being a certain weight doesn’t necessarily make you healthy or unhealthy.

illustration of a thin woman looking into a mirror seeing a larger woman — *Things like eating disorders or even tumors can be missed because someone is considered “overweight” based on their BMI.*

In fact, things like eating disorders or even tumors can be missed because someone is considered “overweight” based on their BMI. Or consider this: someone might reach a weight that makes them healthy and happy, but still fall outside of the “normal” BMI category, and feel pressured to unnecessarily and unrealistically drop even more weight. And, on the other hand, doctors can also assume that someone is healthy simply because their BMI is in the “normal” range.

Dr. Yoni Freedhoff, an associate professor of family medicine at the University of Ottawa, agrees, pointing out that body mass index, which was created as a way to look at groups of people, is “fairly useless when looking at the individual.” It might work to track risks or trends across large populations, but it doesn’t say much about an individual’s actual body composition (muscles vs. bone vs. fat), which means it puts people with more muscle in a higher category. BMI also won’t change if a person’s body composition changes, which could mean missing potential serious health issues.

To put a finer point on the unreliableness of BMI, a 2016 study of more than 40,000 adults in the United States found that it was a pretty poor predictor of metabolic health. Researchers compared people’s BMIs with more specific measurements of their health, like their insulin resistance, markers of inflammation and blood pressure, triglyceride, cholesterol and glucose levels, and found that nearly half of those classified as overweight and about a quarter of those classified as obese were metabolically healthy by these measures. On the other hand, 31% of those with a “normal” body mass index were metabolically unhealthy.

So, a large percentage of our population is being labeled as “not normal,” and thus not healthy, which can be extremely damaging. Experts like Gaudiani point out that using BMI as an important marker of health can create multiple types of vicious cycles, especially in underrepresented populations. For example, a young girl of color might go to a pediatrician at age 7 or 8 and be told that they’re overweight, when in fact they’re just experiencing a normal prepubescent weight surge earlier than a young white girl might. Hearing this at such an early age can put them on track to suffer from mental and physical health issues related to body consciousness and fear that they’re body isn’t “right” or healthy.

To give another example of a vicious BMI cycle: issues that are more prevalent in minority communities – discrimination, lack of access to care, poverty, and even stress – can lead to higher BMIs in those populations, and that in turn can lead to even worse care from the medical community. Doctors can end up focusing solely on a patient’s BMI, and want to discuss their weight before they get to the concerns that brought them to the doctor in the first place. That means legitimate medical concerns that have nothing to do with weight might go neglected, and the patient might even choose not to seek further care, because they end up feeling stigmatized.

According to Lesley Williams, a family medicine physician and certified eating disorder specialist based in Phoenix, Arizona, “I hear time and time again, ‘My physician wouldn’t listen to me. I had this myriad of complaints that had nothing to do with my weight, and all they wanted to do was talk about my weight, and I was not being served, and I’ve just elected not to go back.’”

All of this means that discrimination and lack of access to quality medical care can affect BMI, and they can also simultaneously be the result of a higher BMI, creating an endless cycle. In fact, people who have felt discriminated against because of heavier weight are around 2.5 times more likely to have mood or anxiety disorders, and are more likely to gain weight and have a shorter life expectancy. And the really crazy part? Evidence suggests that having a higher BMI is not even clearly linked to earlier death in minority populations. So it seems that it is much more important that we address the structural factors that lead to poor health, like “poverty, racism, lack of access to healthy fruits and vegetables” and environmental toxins, according to Dr. Strings.

Is There an Alternative?

So with only about a quarter of the U.S. population considered “normal” on the BMI scale, what would be more helpful than focusing on these numbers? Again, it is really important that we focus on the structural things, but that is obviously the long game. Until then, we can use other markers for health, and not focus so much on weight. If you are worried about your weight, though, it might be more helpful to have your doctor monitor your waist size, which could be a better indicator of how much dangerous abdominal fat you have.

But, for doctors who are ditching the BMI as a reliable or helpful tool, it’s more important that they look at the bigger picture of their patients’ health. For example, rather than focusing on body size as a gauge of health, your blood glucose, triglyceride, and blood pressure results can be better windows into your well-being.

How you feel in your body is important, too. In fact, some doctors, like Dr. Freedhoff, “discuss something we call ‘best weight,’ which is whatever weight a person reaches when they’re living the healthiest life they can actually enjoy.” A. Janet Tomiyama, an associate professor of health psychology at the University of California, Los Angeles, agrees, asking simply “Can you go up a flight of stairs and feel good about how you feel after that? How are you able to live your life in the body that you have?”

So being your “best weight,” in conjunction with prioritizing behaviors that are more within your control than your body mass index like, according to Dr. Tomiyama, “better sleep, more exercise, getting a handle on stress and eating more fruits and vegetables” will go a much longer way to making a difference in our lives than a number based on an outdated and biased scale.

Taking the Plunge: Change Careers & Love What You Do

It’s easy to get stuck in a rut in life. It’s even easier to get stuck in that rut when it’s the thing that pays the bills. Let’s face it: sometimes we fall into a job or career because we need to make money, but it’s not really what we want to be doing, and we end up feeling trapped. But it doesn’t necessarily have to be that way! While it can feel super scary, and it’s not for everyone, a change of careers can be life-changing for some people. If you’re thinking that a career change could be the right move for you, to get you out of your rut and bring energy back to your life, how can you go about taking the plunge?

You’re Not Alone

Are you passionate about your job? Probably not (especially if you’re reading this), seeing as only around 20% of workers in the U.S. feel that way. And it’s not just that we’re not gaga over our careers, most studies put us at barely 50% in terms of how many people are even satisfied with their jobs.

And, since so many of us are not married to our jobs, we’re also pretty prone to changing careers. In fact, statistics now show that around half of U.S. workers change jobs every 1-5 years, with 30% of the workforce changing jobs every 12 months! Not only that, but the average person will now have around 5-7 careers in their lifetime, so it seems that the days of getting a job after high school, college, or trade school and sticking with it until it was time to collect your pension (remember those? Probably not!) are well and truly over.

What Makes a Satisfying Career?

So if you’re itching to make a change, and find a more satisfying job, you are by no means alone. But what does a “satisfying’” job actually look like? That’s definitely a subjective assessment, and every person and every workplace are different, but there are actually a few factors that surveys seem to agree are important for job satisfaction.

The most – and least – satisfying jobs, according to surveys, can tell us a lot about what makes people happy in their jobs. When workers are surveyed, the careers that come out on top in terms of job satisfaction include jobs like teacher, nurse, firefighter, physical therapist, software developer, physician, psychologist, and human resources manager. The ones that come out on the bottom? Jobs like waiter, bartender, cashier, roofer, fast food cook, laundry/dry cleaning worker, dishwasher, and parking attendant.

So what does this tell us about the factors important to job satisfaction? According to research, the top jobs are satisfying because:

They offer variety and tend to change from day-to-day, meaning those holding these positions are less likely to get bored.
There is generally an opportunity for advancement
The company culture is positive. While this is more dependent on the individual workplace, these jobs tend to have a more positive work environment.
There is less employee turnover. This is related to positive company culture: the least satisfying jobs tend to have much higher turnover rates, making it difficult to foster meaningful relationships between employees.
Many of them allow employees the opportunity to help people in a meaningful way, and not just a superficial way.
Unlike the least satisfying jobs, they tend to offer more flexibility.
They pay enough to eliminate the stress of not being able to pay the bills.

If you’re thinking that you’re going to have to go back to school for years and years to become a doctor to be satisfied with your career, don’t worry! The takeaway here is that there are some common factors that can make for a more satisfying job. Not only that, but the important thing is finding something that lines up with your core values and is right for you. So how can you start the process of switching careers?

Making the Switch

You’ve got the career change bug, now what? Start with the following steps:

Evaluate how you feel about your current job

A lot of people gloss over this crucial first step, simply telling themselves that they are dissatisfied and want to move on. But before you can find something that you like more, you have to know what it is that’s working and not working for you in your current position. Try keeping a log of your daily reactions to situations in your current job, so you can have a better idea of what day-to-day responsibilities you’d like, what kind of management style works or doesn’t work for you, and the type of environment you do want to work in.

Take a closer look at your skills, core values, and interests

Yes, it’s important to find a job that you can actually do, but don’t stop at your generic job skills. Look at other things you’ve done, like volunteer work or class projects, that you excelled at, or that really excited you. If you simply focus on what you’ve been doing in your current job, you could end up limiting yourself, and getting stuck back in that old rut again.

Rebrand yourself

Looking for a new job means you’re going to have to present a new you. That doesn’t mean you should present yourself as having experience you don’t have, which is always a bad idea. You might just need to be a little creative if your existing experience doesn’t align with your goals, so think about how your experience makes you a better candidate for the job you’re looking for. Make a personal statement about what makes you a good fit, and make sure this personal statement is reflected on your resume, and on your accounts on business networking sites, like LinkedIn.

Start your search, and get personal

As you begin your search, make an action plan, and make goals for yourself with specific timelines. Then head to job search sites, social media, and the websites of companies you might be interested in. Don’t forget to try more personal routes, as well: speak to friends, professionals in your network, former classmates, and recruiters. You can also reach out to professionals in the industry you’re looking at, and see who might be willing to speak to you.

Look outside of your industry

As we noted above, not looking outside of your comfort zone could lead to getting stuck yet again. So consider looking at what’s available in industries that you might have an interest in, and what it would take to get into them. Also, consider talking to people you’re close with, and asking them if they could see you in any of the new roles you’re considering. If you’re having difficulty coming up with ideas, consider meeting with a career counselor for professional advice.

Look inside your industry

You don’t have to discount your industry if it’s still something that interests you. The problem might be your workplace, or the position you’re in (which is why it’s important to track your feelings about your current job). You might just need to move to a company or another branch location that better correlates with your skills and long-term goals. For example, you might want to move from working at a retail store to a corporate office, or if you’re a programmer but not interested in programming any longer, consider technical sales or project management.

Try freelancing or volunteering

illustration of an owl sitting on a book — *Always keep trying to learn new things and skills related to your industry so you can soar in your role.*

It can be hard to get experience when you don’t have experience, right? If you’re looking to advance your career or break into something new, you could try getting some valuable experience by freelancing in fields with high demand, or by offering your time as a volunteer at a local nonprofit (which can be very satisfying in itself!). For example, if you want to get into editing or publishing, offer to help with the newsletter of a local organization, or your child’s school. Want to work with animals? Volunteer at a local shelter.

Expand your knowledge or skill set

Whether you want a new position in your industry, or to make the jump to a totally new field, going back to school, getting a new certification, attending seminars, workshops or webinars, or engaging in any kind of continuing education related to the position you want could give you a leg up. For example, you could take an evening class at a local college, or attend a workshop on grant-writing.

The benefits of being happy in your job are clear: in fact, over three-quarters of people who change careers say they are happy, and almost 70% say they are less stressed and more fulfilled. So if you want to make a positive change in your life, now is the time! Don’t look back and wonder where the last year, 5 years, or decade went. It’s your life and you deserve to get everything out of it you can!